He's Arrived!

I'll have to make this short and sweet since I only have a few spare minutes and this is LONG overdue.

Christian has arrived! He was born on February 26th (8 days early) and came in weighing 7 lbs. 5 oz.. Already I can see a difference in his personality versus J's personality, but it'll be interesting to see how he develops.

On the whole, things have been going well. We had a bit of a rough start with weight gain, but he seems to have caught up. Breastfeeding is going well, although, he's been nursing every 2-2.5 hrs which means I've gotten NO sleep. It's been brutal and I can't recall if it was this bad with J.

The biggest change so far has probably been for Doc who has had the bulk of the responsibility for J thrust upon him (literally, thrust). It's been a shocker for him since he's basically become J's primary caregiver since I tied at the nipple to C.

Ah, but I will write more again later. I just wanted to give an update before C turned 1.

2 More Months

Hello and Happy New Year! It's been a very long time since I've written anything and so much has happened. Let's see...where to start?

Well, first off, I'm 32 weeks pregnant and still hanging in there. The pregnancy has been so much more difficult the second time around since I spend most of my awake time either at work or running around after J. When I was pregnant with Jason, for the most part, I was happy and maybe even had some of that pregnancy "glow." The only glow that I'm emanating now is the glow from nausea that I still get every once in awhile, mostly when Baby #2 (we haven't come up with a name yet) is moving around, and let me tell you, this baby moves like it's nobody's business.

Due date is March 6th and my last day of work will be February 19th. Part of me is rejoicing that I'm less than 2 months away from giving birth and NOT being pregnant, but at the same time I know there's a world of sleepless nights, chaos and just plain torture waiting for us as soon as this baby is born. I just pray that this time around I don't have to push for three hours!

As for J, he's now 20 months and just a whirlwind of words and actions. His three favorite words: "parque" (Spanish for "park"), "outside" and "cosina" (Spanish for "kitchen"). It's really amazing how much he's learning. He talks non-stop and loves either going outside to the park to play or playing with his toy kitchen at home. Between Spanish and English, his vocabulary is really extensive and I'm so thankful that he's getting this exposure to two languages (three, if you include the minute amount of Korean he gets exposed to when my mother comes over).

But, life is not necessarily a bed of roses...and we're also dealing with a bit of difficulty in social interaction, which translates to a whole lot of grabbing and pushing. J is a little bit ahead when it comes to physical coordination and he's above the 90th percentile in height, so he uses both to his advantage when he's "playing" with other kids. Although we're trying, it's been a rough road attempting to teach J that it's not nice to push other kids and take their toys. It's even more challenging when people come over and start playing with his toys. Sharing is definitely not a natural concept.

So, this leads me to my next fear which is introducing him to his little brother...Being the center of household and having to relinquish his kingly status is not going to come easy. When J finds out he's not the only sheriff in town, there's going to be a serious fight at the OK Corral.

So, that's where we're at. I feel so much less prepared this time around and wonder where the time has gone! I still have to dig up my pump, newborn clothes/toys, get diapers, install the carseat, pack my hospital bag...and the list goes on.

Human Again

After two and a half months of constant nausea and fatigue I'm starting to feel human again. Slowly, but surely I'm making my way out of the first trimester (plus some) of traumatizing, mind-numbing morning sickness. Add to that having to deal with the busy season at work and then come home to an intensely energetic toddler and you have a recipe for complete and utter misery.

Seriously, part of me wonders how I made it through the last three months. It's been torturous and in so many ways so much worse than the first time around. The only saving grace was that I knew that there was light at the end of the tunnel and this pain would not last forever. That being said, when you're about to collapse from exhaustion after work, your stomach is in shambles, your little one is begging you to go to the park, and you somehow have to get dinner ready, you have to wonder, for a brief second, if it's worth it.

So, yes, as you can tell, I'm still pregnant and so far things have been going fairly smoothly. It's so different this time around and part of me feels a little guilty already to #2. I definitely don't have the same amount of time to think about him (we're 90% sure it's a boy from the NT scan) and rest the way I did with J. Last time around I would count the days until my next OB appointment, but this time I have to look on the calendar to make sure I don't miss it.

At 16 months, J is a handful. He has so much energy and never sits still. It's actually a running joke that everybody in the neighborhood knows him because we're always out. We're either at the park or the school or storytime or kindergym. As soon as we say the word "outside," he'll run to get his jacket and his shoes and he'll wait by the door.

It's amazing how much he's absorbing on a day-to-day basis. He can say about a dozen words from umma (mom in korean) to shoes and his nanny's name. But, he knows/understands body parts and can point to them: head, ears, eyes, nose, mouth, toes, fingers, foot in both English and Spanish (his nanny speaks to him 100% in Spanish). He knows "vamonos" and says "a-do" for adios and knows that when  you pick up the phone you say "hello" but when he sees people he says "hi." He also knows about half a dozen animals from monkey to goldfish and mimics their sounds.

I just can't believe how much he's grown and to see his personality shining through. J is so incredibly independent...Other moms actually comment on it at the park. He wants to do everything on his own and only asks for help when he knows he needs it (i.e., climbing big stairs).

It's been wonderful so far, but we've had our challenges, too. We're starting to hit some tantrums and pickiness with food. Also, he's been transitioning to one nap and that's been a bit difficult. He's only been sleeping for 1.5 hours in the afternoon and he definitely needs more than that. So, not all rainbows and unicorns, but we're getting through it.

Last but not least, a very happy pic of J during dinner.

Months...

I know it's been months since I've written here and I don't know if anyone is still reading this, but I thought I might just post a quick update because soooooo much has been going on.

1) J's first birthday was a success! We had the Korean traditional dol ceremony and he ended up selecting the pencil which means he'll be a scholar. We were hoping for the money, but being smart is not so bad either. Anyway, we just barely managed to pull the whole thing off because...

2) We moved! Yes, we finally moved to our "dream" area. It's a small suburb of SF and has great schools. It was completely unexpected. We had been looking for awhile and put on an offer in on our first home which was rejected for another all-cash offer. But, low and behold, 2 months later the seller's agent contacted us and asked if we were still interested because the cash offer had not materialized. So, right when we were about to leave for our vacation to Ireland (yes, we were planning on our first real international vacay with J) we ended up in escrow and having to cancel our trip. We really like the new neighborhood, but part of me misses the diversity of our old 'hood.

3) Ah, so, that leads me to the selling of our old home which was the BIGGEST pain in the ass. With a baby at home all day (with our nanny) it was so hard to schedule viewings of our house. People wanted to come in the middle of his nap or in the evening after his bedtime. Luckily, it sold pretty quickly, right after the first and only open house. But after experiencing the pain of selling, buying and moving, we've decided that we're never moving again. Someone will have to remove my dead body from this  house.

4) Speaking of nannies, this was also the biggest clusterf**k ever. Our nanny, whom I'll refer to as Mim, has been with us since J was a little less than 6 months. She is great! She fits well with the family, super energetic, loves J and vice versa, very outgoing and is in general a really nice person. But (there's always a but) she doesn't drive and we were fortunate that our old house was within walking distance from BART (ah, BART...that is another headache we're dealing with because of the damn strike, but I digress). Ok, well, the new house is not within walking distance to BART, however, there's a bus that runs from BART that will drop you off about 3 blocks from our house. Our concern was that although Mim may be able to get to-from our house, how would she ever get J to the park and any other activities. So, began our search for a new nanny...In a span of 3 weeks we interviewed 8 nannies, and "tested" 2 nannies. One nanny we immediately knew was not for us and the second nanny we tried out for 3 weeks. I assumed J would get used to his new nanny, but he never did. He would cry and whine every morning when I left and would never be happy to see her. But, the kicker was when I found out she had been doing her laundry at our house without ever asking us. She would bring in her laundry after I would leave in the AM and hide it back in her car before I came home. I wasn't so angry about the laundry itself, but the fact that she was hiding this and doing her laundry "secretively" behind our backs. It just bothered the crap out of me, so we gave her the boot and asked Mim if she'd be willing to take J on the bus to the park and around the 'hood. And so far it's been great! He loves riding on the bus and is so happy to see Mim in the morning. I guess I took it for granted that it was so easy to find Mim...I didn't realize how hard it is to find a good nanny.

5) The other life changing event (or possibly event-to-be)...I am pregnant! We got a surprise BFP last week after my period was late. I still can't believe it. I checked my HCG on Monday and it was 1,215 and on Wednesday it had increased to 2,800. So, it's doubled and we're progressing along. Based on my LMP, I should be about 5 weeks pregnant (give or take a day or two). Doc and I are still shocked. We had just scheduled a workup date in August with CC.RM for our FET, and had planned to do the actual FET in November. That way J and the baby would be a little over 2 years apart and we'd have time to fit in a nice international trip during my second tri. I still can't believe that I'm actually pregnant considering my first real period was my last one back in May. We have our first ultrasound scheduled in a three weeks so I'm still really wary of expecting too much. I mean, come on, we did 4 IVFs to get J!

So, I'm still alive and kicking, although sometimes I feel like things are a bit out of control. And with that, I'll leave you with a couple of pics of J.

Excuse the nasty bib, J's been teething like a maniac and drools constantly.

2013

Where do I even start...First, happy new year! I can't believe this is my first post for 2013. It's been way too long. 

For the first time in several years, we actually stayed at home for the holidays. We had planned to go to Tahoe for a few days and maybe even get some snow time in, but the day after Xmas it started pouring and the roads were a nightmare, so we decided to bag the trip and instead just hang out. So, we spent the holidays at home chillin' and relaxin' and not doing much of anything. 

January and February have been a blur. J started crawling and pulling himself up to standing position and along with that was having to baby proof every inch of our house. He's such a busy-body and loves people (no stranger anxiety whatsoever), so we try to get him out of the house as much as possible and schedule play dates with friends. It's so cute to see him interact with other babies. It's mostly just a bunch of pulling hair, touching faces, and grabbing toys.

Add to that my mother's trip to Korea which got extended for an extra 2 months which caused us to scramble in order to find care for J (she was watching J one day per week). Luckily, both my job and Doc's job provides a back-up care benefit. It wasn't easy, though, because my mom changed her return date on us 3 times! Granted the rescheduling wasn't her fault since she was there to take care of some family financial stuff, but it was a pain in the ass.

And then add a spoonful of our seemingly neverending search for a new home...The housing market is again heating up in the Bay Area and we've put in offers for two houses at asking price and have been rejected. Every weekend is spent going to open houses which we somehow have to finagle around J's nap time.

And then add a pinch of new job anxiety. Yep, that's right, in the middle of all this, I was interviewing for new jobs. I wasn't actively looking to leave my current job, but I got contacted through linked.in by two companies and decided to try for them. The second company offered me a package that I just couldn't refuse that included working from home 3 days per week. So, I'll be starting that in 3 weeks! I've been in my current position for almost 5 years, so I'm a bit apprehensive about the move, but I think it'll be a good thing...well, at least hoping that it'll be a good thing.

And last, we add in two tsps of a vacation to Ireland in April and J's first birthday (Korean dol) in May. We've preparing for our two weeks in Ireland at the beginning of April and keeping our fingers crossed that J will make it through the flight without too many breakdowns. And, we've started planning for his birthday in May. The first birthday is a big event for Koreans, so there's a lot of planning to do. We've rented out the community center and anticipate somewhere between 60-80 people to be there.

On that final note, I leave you with a pic of our recent lunch date.

Pics!

I think it's been awhile since I posted any pics, so rather than bore you with more inane details of my life, I'll entertain with some pics of J.

Hanging out with his friend, Sophie.

6 months!

Happy Halloween!

Updates!

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving! It's amazing that 2012 is almost over. I realized how much I have to be grateful for this year, and I just can't wait for 2013. Jason will turn 1 and we'll probably go back to Colorado to try for #2.

We're almost to 7 months and I have to say that I still can't believe that we've made it this far! I know I'm far overdue for updates, but with work and the holidays, life was freakin' crazy. Things that have been going on:

• J is now sleeping like a champ. We had to resort to a modified Ferber, but now he goes to bed (sleepy but awake) at 7pm and sleeps straight through until 6am. We weaned him from his last night feeding at 6 months after I realized he just wasn't that hungry when he woke up in the mornings.  Unfortunately, I still get up once a night to pump, but that's another matter. Crying it out was not easy at all, but it was so worth it, both for Doc and I and for Jason.
• J's naps have also improved now that he knows how to put himself to sleep. He gets 3 naps a day between 2-3 hours. 
• Teeth! We now have two on the bottom and one coming in on top. The little man is a super-eater and has three meals a day and 4 nursing sessions. Favorite food: sweet potatoes; least favorite food: bananas. Yeah, we don't understand why he hates bananas so much, but they make him gag. I make all his food, so we've experimented with a few more atypical baby veggies and fruits, like persimmons, beets (super messy, but he really likes these), and cauliflower.
• The babbling has begun...He's such a little talker and is starting to make sounds like ma-ma and ba-ba. He'll babble to himself for a good 10-15 minutes if he's happy and just hanging out in the stroller. 
• Jason loves being outside and around people. We make an effort to take him out to the park or story time everyday so that he can see the world. It's so fun to watch him take in everything!
• I'm below my pre-pregnancy weight. I'm not sure how that happened, but between being so busy with work and Jason and nursing, I just haven't been able to eat that much and sure enough, I'm actually able to fit into clothes that I wasn't even able to wear before I got pregnant!
• Nanny is working out great. We were really worried after the NY nanny murders and got super paranoid, but we realized that our nanny is fantastic and she really cares about our little man. She notices when he's not his usual self (like after he got his flu shot and had a little cold) and she gives really thorough reports everyday on what they did together. We're so grateful that we found her!

5 1/2 Months

I can't believe my little man will be 6 months in just two weeks. Time has flown by in a blur and it seems like just yesterday that we had brought him back from the hospital.

It seems like everyday there's something new to discover. J now has two little pearly whites popping up from the bottom of his mouth and he's been eating solids since the 5 month mark. Our pediatrician gave us the thumbs-up on starting solids, so we cautiously started with rice cereal which he absolutely loved. Then we made our way to butternut squash (not so much love), avocado (a hit!), pears (thumbs down), and just yesterday, sweet potatoes (love at first taste).

It's also been so fun to see his little personality start to develop. He just loves being outside and around people and is always "chatting" it up. Our nanny has started to take him to the library story time once a week and she says J loves it. He watches the older kids dance and play and "talks" when the volunteer is reading. The only time he's sad is when he has to go back in the stroller. Definitely no signs of stranger anxiety.

As for my transition back to the working world, it really hasn't been too bad. I miss our little man dearly, but I know that he's in good, caring hands with our nanny (she is so awesome) and I'm actually enjoying being back at work. I've also realized that being back at work is a hell of a lot easier than being home with J all day...being a SAHM is definitely no walk in the park (although I did do a lot of walking in the park when I stayed at home, but that's a different story).

Doc and I have discussed the subject of me quitting my job and staying at home, but we probably won't do that until we move out of our current house and move into a "better" house. Not that our current home isn't good, but we decided a long time ago that we would want to move out of our house into a bigger home with a nice yard and a better neighborhood as soon as we could. It's been a slow going process, but we hope to move next year...Being in the Bay Area, the neighborhood that we're looking at is averaging about $1M for a house (for those of you outside the SF Bay Area, this actually isn't that pricey), so we've had to take our time to build up enough for a down payment and we hope that have that ready by next summer.

And, another note on moi! I have lost all the baby weight and more. Considering I have done no exercise with the exception of walking with J in his stroller, I can only credit the breastfeeding. I can actually feel myself get significantly hungrier after I nurse him. It's amazing!

I started going back to the gym last week just because I was starting to feel a bit sluggish and thought that maybe some exercise would help. Plus, I don't get to go on my daily walks with J anymore. But, I'm nowhere near the "athlete" that I used to be, not that I was that much of an athlete before I got pregnant. After more than a year of not running, it's a slow build up back.

So, that's about it for now! I'll post some pics of J next time!

Back To Life

Five months! I can't believe it's already been five months...There's so much to update on, I don't even know where to start. 

These past couple of months have been a blur and that's partly why I've been MIA. Between sleep training (yes, we had to do this), going on a two week vacation to Hawaii, and looking for a nanny, life was just one thing after another. Hopefully, now that I'm back at work (yep, I started yesterday), I'll actually have some time to read blogs and write!

So, to begin with, Jason is now 5 months old. He's been rolling, rolling, rolling everywhere! Stomach, back, stomach, back. It's so cute, until he gets stuck or hits a wall and starts crying. And even, then it brings a smile to my face. In addition to that, he just got his first tooth! A little white tooth is starting to sprout and it's so adorable. Unfortunately, that means he's chewing the crap out of everything...His new favorite toy, Sophie the Giraffe. He gnaws the crap out of that thing. 

Sleep...the holy grail! We're almost sleeping through the night. Jason now wakes up only once at around 2AM for one feed. Although, there are times when he still cries at night, he'll usually let out a whimper or a howl for all of 1-2 minutes and then go back to sleep. The sleep training was hard, but it's been so worth it. Rocking him to sleep every 2-3 hours was just not sustainable anymore...My back and wrists were hurting so much, I really couldn't function during that day, so again, the ST was difficult, but oh, so worth it.

Nanny time! I just have to say that if I were a billionaire (or even just a millionaire), I'd have a nanny 24 hours a day. It was so wonderful to have our nanny start one week early, both for the transition, so I could see her interact with Jason and for the opportunity to enjoy my last week of maternity leave. I got my haircut, a massage, ate lunch with friends, and even made it to the gym. It was amazing. Needless to say, we have a great nanny. She's wonderful with Jason and has tons of experience. So, although being at work has been difficult because I miss the little guy so, so much, it also hasn't been as bad as I thought it would be because I feel comfortable.

And, lastly, coming back to work. It's actually been pretty nice to be back. I didn't realize how much I missed work and my coworkers. Plus, I can actually get stuff done at work (like surf the net). 

With that I'll leave you with a pic of Jason and his first encounter with the Pacific Ocean (our vacation to Hawaii). He was none too happy.

Hello, stranger!

Yeah, it's been awhile. So long that I don't even know where to begin, so I'll just start from the beginning:

1. Jason is now 3.5 months old! He's grabbing his toes, babbling, lifting his head while doing tummy time, and sitting up with only a little bit of support. It's amazing how much he's grown in the past month. I'm amazed to see him doing something new every week. He's so much more alert and oh, so curious, wanting to look at every little thing. Never in a million years would I have imagined that he'd grow up this fast.

2. BUT, there is a downside and that is sleep...The baby that used to only awake one time a night for a feed is now a sleep monster! I think we're in what the internet and the boards call the 4-Month Sleep Regression. He now wakes up 2-3 times between 7pm and 9pm and then wakes up at least 2 more times during the night for feeds. That is, if we're lucky he wakes up only 2 more times. If the stars are not aligned and the gods hate us, then we're looking at a wake up every hour. Anyone have any advice on this?

3. Sleep training...we're seriously considering doing sleep training. We were using the recommendations provided by the Baby Whisperer book and shh/patting to get him to sleep, but now he's beyond that and it really isn't working anymore. I would prefer having to resort to Ferberizing, but it may come down to that because he will not go back to sleep unless we pick him up and rock him for at least 5 minutes. Since I'm at home, I can do this 3-4 times per night, but once I have to go back to work, this isn't going to be feasible. Plus, my arms, wrists, and back are killing me.

4. Naps...let's not even get into that one. 30 minutes on the dot and he wakes up. Sometimes I can catch him right as he begins to stir and get him back to sleep, otherwise, forget about it. This is the same guy that used to sleep for 2+ hours for his naps. Oh, and did I mention that he only takes naps in his swing?

5. The next big thing we have to tackle is weaning him from the swaddle. We already tried going cold turkey and that did not work. The little guy was out of control...arms flailing, legs going every which way. It was almost comical watching him on the video monitor. Needless to say, he didn't get much sleep that night. So, I'm trying to nap him with only one arm in the swaddle, when I can actually get him to nap. I have a feeling this whole weaning process is going to take a long time.

6. And we're looking for a nanny. Not an easy process. We have a three interviews set up this week and we're hoping that one of them is a success. Two of the three responded to an ad I put in the local parents network forum and one of the three came with a recommendation from a parent. Crossing my fingers that we'll find a great nanny for Jason.

And, I could go on and on, but I won't. So for now, this is what has been consuming my life and rendering my unable to post regularly. I hope everyone is doing well and I send good sleep vibes to all....

Random

Not much to write about, but wanted to let you know that I'm alive and kicking. Some of the things that are going on in my life:

1. I got checked out by my OB and all has healed well and I've got the green light to try for some sexy time. This has Doc very happy, me not so much. Sex drive is on super low and I feel bad for Doc because it's been a very long time. There wasn't much going on the last trimester because of the bloating and general malaise and prior to that, I was restricted because of my placenta previa, so poor Doc has been on a dry spell for awhile.

2. Jason is growing like a weed. He's already at 11 lbs and has been putting on weight like there's no tomorrow. He's been smiling and cooing and gurgling. It's just amazing at how much he develops everyday!

3. Breastfeeding is about the same, but I think I've figured out what's causing all the fussiness. Jason seems to want to suck and not eat and he gets pissed when he starts sucking and discovers a mouthful of milk. I've started to give him a pacifier after his feeding and he seems really content to suck on that for about 5-10 mins. I guess it's sort of like an after dinner mint? Poor guy...it took me forever to figure this out.

4. Carpal tunnel sucks. My wrists are killing me and it's getting worse as Jason gets heavier. I'm wearing wrists splints at night but it's too difficult to hold J and wear them during the day.

5. Is this bad? I'm already thinking about baby #2 since we have 2 frozen blasts back in Colorado. I know it's way early to be thinking this way, but I really want a sibling for Jason and can't help, but hope that one of those blasts will give us another little baby.

6. Pumping...I have to start thinking about pumping and freezing since I'll be going back to work in October and everyone has told me that their milk starts to dwindle when they go back to work. I actually thought about renting the hospital grade Medela Symphony, but after talking to the lactation consultant, I settled on the Medela Pump In Style.

If you got through my boring rambling, I'll leave you with a couple of Jason pics!

Face of contentment right after a big meal!

Sleepy!

6 weeks...well, almost.

J is almost 6 weeks old! It's really hard to believe that he's been in our lives for over a month. On one hand it feels like eternity, but on the other, 6 weeks has gone by super fast. It's been a whirlwind of poop, pee, crying, and feeding.

He's actually been a pretty good little guy with the exception of these past few days. I'm not sure if it's the six week growth spurt (supposedly the most difficult) or if it's just that he's finally becoming a little being and developing his personality, but he's been much fussier than normal.

For example, he's been a perfect little feeder from the start, but these past few days he's been incredibly fussy at my breast, particularly the right one...He'll start fine and then a few minutes into his meal, he'll start fussing, pulling, and grunting, but he won't let go of the nipple. Oh, and his little arms start flailing all over the place. Sometimes, I can calm him down enough so that he finishes his meal, but most of the time, he'll get so agitated that I have to switch over to the other breast. I know it's doesn't have anything to do with a fast let-down. It's actually been so frustrating that I've made an appt with the hospital's lactation nurse to see what the fuss is all about. Hopefully, we'll get some answers.

The other "change" in personality is a bit more concerning. He doesn't like car rides anymore. Before, he'd fall asleep immediately in the car and it was so nice because I'd actually be able to go out and meet people. Pop him in the car, he'd fall asleep, and then he'd stay asleep when I took him out and plopped him in his stroller. Now, he's so agitated in the car that he doesn't fall asleep and then he's crying when I take him out which results in him crying in the stroller and let me tell you, it's no fun strolling the mall with a crying baby.

I've "discovered" a few work arounds, though. One, white noise. I turn that sucker on LOUD in the car and it calms him down a bit and every once in awhile, it'll actually get him to go to sleep.

Two, the exercise ball...It's been a life saver. I bounce gently on that thing with him in my arms and within ten mins he's asleep. That combined with the white noise on the stereo and his swaddle and we're good to go for the night.

Any recommendations from other moms on how to soothe a baby or maybe some insight into why he's so fussy at my breast?

Week 3

Time flies! It's already been three weeks since Jason officially entered our lives. Even with the sleep deprivation and carpal tunnel, these three weeks have been amazing. I never imagined that being a mother would be like this...completely, utterly, all consuming love.

Sometimes, when I'm alone with him at home, I think back to all that we went through to have him in our lives and I'm speechless. Tears start welling up in my eyes and I feel so incredibly grateful and happy; I'm turned into a blubbering fool and all I can do is hope that everyone that is struggling to conceive gets to feel what I feel. It's a blessing that I can't even begin to describe.

With that being said, I have learned a few things during these three weeks and I'll pass on my experiences:

1. Swaddle...Jason cannot sleep without being swaddled and we've tried all different types of swaddles. The Kid*dopotmus sack, regular swaddle blankets, Swaddle*Me with the velcro -- J was able to break out of all of them within seconds. So, we tried the Miracle Blanket and voila, it worked! He was snug as a bug in a rug and slept a full three hours!
2. Carpel tunnel. It sucks. I have it in both wrists from picking him up and holding him in awkward positions. It doesn't help that all my computer use had already laid the ground work for CT. Now, I have to wear braces which really sucks when you're trying to pick up or hold the baby. Word of advice: try to use your whole arm and not your hand/wrist to support the baby when you're holding him.
3. Leaky diapers. We had such a leaky diaper fiasco for the first two weeks. Basically, his diaper was leaking every single time he peed or pooped. We couldn't figure out what was wrong. We went out and bought several different newborn diaper brands, and even put him a size 1 (very large for his tiny body), but nothing seemed to work. Finally, we figured out that the freakin' vaseline we were told to put on his diaper to keep his circumcised peepee from sticking to the diaper was creating a barrier and keeping the diaper from absorbing. Since his little wiener has now healed and we don't need to grease his nappy, there's been no more leaks.
4. Clogged ducts. I've already gotten them in my right boob. For some reason, J doesn't seem to dig my right boob very much and as a result, it doesn't get drained properly which resulted in a very painful, very engorged right breast. So, for the past few days, I've been using a warm compress right before I feed J on my right boob. It seems to get the milk flowing and almost "forces" him to drink.

Lastly, I just want to say how happy I am for both Newbie and TurtleMama!! 

Pictures!

Finally! I think we may have gotten to a point where Jason is actually sleeping 3-4 hours between night feedings. With 30 mins for feeding, 15 mins for burping and changing, and then another 15 mins to get him back to sleep, our 2-hour feedings were leaving me with just 1 hour to sleep before having to get up for another cycle.

Overall, he's a great little baby and not too fussy. He loves to eat and makes the cutest little noises at night...grunting, gurgling, snorting and farting. I couldn't have asked for a better baby. This little guy has stolen our hearts. We can't even imagine what life was like without him.

Me, on the other hand, well, I'm definitely much more emotional. I cry at everything. I've never cried so much in my life. Whether it's something sad or something happy, I'll burst into tears at a moments notice and it's driving me crazy! It's like I have a split personality...Half my brain (the rationale half) is telling me to stop crying, and the other half is so emotional that I can't stop myself from crying. I'm hoping that this emotional roller coaster will calm down once I get some more sleep and once the hormones start evening out. It's been difficult because it's hard to explain to my mom and Doc why I'm crying when really, there's no particular reason and once I start, it takes me awhile for me to stop and next thing you know, I'm crying, Jason's crying and Doc just looks confused and helpless.

Even with all the hormones, emotions, and sleep deprivation, I wouldn't trade this for anything. This little guy is my pride and joy. I'll leave you with some pics that my brother-in-law took for us at 10 days.

                                                                                             

Birth Story - Part 2

Before I start the second part of Jason's (yep, little J) birth story, I have to put in two cents about my first Mother's Day. I really didn't know what to expect. I had dreamed about this for so long, becoming a mother and not just watching from the sidelines wondering when (or even if) it would be my turn. I feel so incredibly grateful, fortunate, happy and content. Even as I write this, I'm tearing up with emotion. I've been so blessed to have this little crying, pooping, sleeping miracle enter my life...the best Mother's Day gift ever.

Ah, so, now, where was I...Oh, yeah, the contractions! At 4 am, the doctor came in to check my progress and announced that I was 4 cm dilated. Hooray -- progress! At that point, my contractions were incredibly painful and coming 1-2 minutes apart, so I gave in and decided to take the epidural. They moved me from the "laboring" room to the "delivery" room and called the anesthesiologist, who luckily was able to come fairly quickly.

The epidural was a godsend, but unfortunately, I wasn't progressing and it took me another 12 hours to dilate to 10 cm.  During the wait, I developed a fever of 101.4 (I swear it was because I had had no food or water for over 24 hours) and so they started me on antibiotics. So, at this point I had the epidural, penicillin (since I was Group B Strep positive), antibiotics and the saline IV being pumped into my body. 

In the meantime, I was also dealing with the most incompetent nurse ever, who ended up burning me with hot compress. When she had changed the penicillin bag, she forgot(?) to dilute the medication and when it went in, it felt like my entire hand and arm was on fire. So, in her pathetic attempt to alleviate the pain, she put a hot compress on my hand which left a big red burn. One of the other nurses noticed the burn and thought it was an allergic reaction to the IV and they spent 10 minutes debating whether or not to move the IV to my other hand. I nearly flipped my lid and told them that they could NOT move the IV. At some point during the argument, they agreed that it probably was not in my best interest to move the IV.

So, here I am at 4pm and they decide that I'm ready to push although I'm not fully 10 cm AND the baby is still at +1 (hasn't completely dropped). After one hour of pushing, the delivery team tells me that if I don't start making more progress, they may have to resort to a c-section. Not something you want to tell a woman after 29 hours of labor...If I wasn't so deliriously tired, I think I would've said some not so choice words. However, at this point, some very wise individual (can't remember who) decided that I needed to lower my epidural and they halved it. Once that happened, I could actually feel exactly where to push (I know this may sound odd, but it's sort of like a poop that's stuck), so after another 2 hours of pushing, our baby boy, Jason was brought into this world with a very loud cry!

Battle wounds included: one small hemorrhoid, one small tear, and a burn from a hot compress. Overall, the battle was well worth it and I can honestly say that I'd do it all over again! 

Birth Story - Part 1

Where do I even start?! I guess I'll start from the very beginning which was the morning of Wednesday, May 3rd...

I had a routine appointment scheduled with my OB to check on my status since I was one week past my due date. When I went in, she did the requisite check for the heartbeat and fundal measurement, and then she went on to tell me that she had scheduled an induction for me on Friday, May 5th if I did not go into labor in the next couple of days. I had actually thought the induction would be scheduled for the following week, closer to week 42, but my OB felt that it would be better to induce before the weekend (sounds good to me).

So, based on her rec, I agreed to the appointment and was mentally preparing for a weekend delivery, UNTIL she checked my cervix and saw blood...more than what she believed should be seen if I had bloody show (which is what I thought it was). My OB recommended that I go to the hospital L&D and have them monitor and get a second opinion. Her thought was that I'd be sent in home before lunch, which was what I was anticipating.

With my OB referral and debating what I should have for lunch, I waddled to the hospital L&D unit and was hooked up for a non-stress test which showed that the baby was doing fine and I was having zero contractions. Visions of burritos and chips/salsa were on mind (yum...lunch), until the doctor was finished with his check and he told that he, too, was concerned with the blood. There was a possibility it could be a placental abruption and that since I was going to be induced on Friday anyway, it would be better if we just did the induction now.

Needless to say, I was a bit surprised. I immediately called Doc and told him that I was being admitted and that he should cancel his patients for the PM and bring his butt down to the hospital. After that, I called my mom and sister and asked them both to come to the hospital.

Next thing I know, I'm being hooked up to an IV and I'm getting my first dose of pitocin. Since they were concerned that I may have to do a c-section, they didn't allow me to eat or drink anything. Ice chips were my consolation prize and let me tell you, ice chips are a pretty sh***y consolation prize when all you've had to eat all day is a bowl of cereal.

They started me on 2 milliunits of pitocin, which didn't do much. I began to feel some contractions, but nothing to severe and then they upped it to 4 and that's when things started moving. Although reaction to dosages do differ from person to person, I guess I'm one of the lucky few who really react to the meds and at 4 milliunits my contractions were coming pretty strong and pretty close together.

This was around 6pm in the evening (my sister and mother had come by this time) and I was feeling pretty crappy. After the doctor checked me, she said that most likely I wouldn't deliver tonight because I was still not 100% effaced nor was I dilated. So, I told my sister and mother to go home and that we'd call them when there was more action.

Basically, things stayed the same for the remainder of the night with the doctors adjusting the pitocin between 3 and 4 and waiting for my body to dilate. I knew there was some progress being made because the contractions were more and more painful.

Part 2 to come

He's Here!

Just a quick announcement (more will be posted later): J has arrived! Weighing in at 7 lbs 15 oz and 21.5 inches, he made his impressive entrance on Thursday, March 3rd after 31 hours of labor and 3 hours of very painful, very strenuous pushing.

I apologize for the late, late posting, but I've been so incredibly busy and only just arrived back from the hospital yesterday. 

Overdue - 40w4d

Well, I'm still here...waiting. I'm officially four days past my due date and the little stinker seems to be perfectly content on staying inside.

At this point, I'm feeling very heavy and just all around uncomfortable. I can't do much because I can't walk for very long periods of time, sleeping is just painful and I wake up at least 3-4 times per night, and I most definitely need to be near a bathroom at all times. I love this little guy so much, but I just wish he'd come out. Doc and I are going stir crazy just waiting and responding to a gazillion texts from friends and family wondering if he's here yet. 

I have another doctor's appointment on Wednesday and I'm assuming at that time they'll ask me if and when I'd like to induce in case he doesn't want to arrive before 42 weeks. Our hospital's policy is to induce if they baby hasn't arrived by 42 weeks because studies have shown that after 42 weeks there is an increased risk of stillbirth. I hope it doesn't come to that and I go into labor naturally, but if not, at least there's light at the end of the tunnel!

Due Date!

Today is my official delivery date, but alas, no stork, no baby, no nothing...It seems that the little rascal is content where he is and has no plans on leaving his comfortable abode. So, we wait and wait.

At this point, I'd really like to have him join the outside world so that I can have my uterus back. He's getting very big, which equals very uncomfortable for me. And, not to mention, we'd like to meet the little kiddo!

We had an ultrasound done last week since my fundal measurement was smaller than prior weeks, just to make sure that he was still growing and that the decrease was due to him dropping and  not anything else. Everything checked out just fine and the little guy is measuring within the range albeit a little smaller than the actual date (38w vs 39w). But, I was told this was ok, because ultrasound measurements done at this stage are not as accurate since the babes are too big and it's hard to get good measurements when they're all squished up.

Tomorrow, I go in for another doctor's appointment to do a non stress test and see if, again, everything is a-ok to let me go past my due date and then I'm assuming that they'll probably schedule a date for induction if the little guy decides that he is not going to arrive without a little prodding. I'd really like to avoid doing that, so I might ask for a membrane sweep (supposedly, helps to get the process started).

Let's hope that he decides to arrive soon!

39w1d

We are officially down to less than one week! Next Wednesday, April 25th is my official due date and we've begun the final countdown.

At first, my doctor had estimated that the baby would be early based on my "symptoms" including diarrhea (fun!), cramps (even more fun!), contractions, and backaches, but then she checked my cervix and although I'm about 40% effaced and my cervix is shortening, I guess it's still not close enough to indicate any impending labor. Oh, and let me tell you, getting your cervix checked sucks...It's really, really uncomfortable. Imagine pap smear but 10x worse.

One interesting thing and maybe even something of concern, but I'm not jumping the gun yet, is that my fundal height has shrunk quite a bit. My doctor suspects it's because the baby has dropped significantly and even I can tell that by where I can feel his hiccups...they are way lower. But, just to be safe and to make sure that the baby is growing and there are no issues with the amniotic fluid, we're having an ultrasound done today. I love having ultrasounds done! It's so great to see him and typically, Doc makes time to come to the ultrasounds with me (he hasn't been going to the prenatal visits due to conflicts with his clinic hours).

My doctor also estimates that the baby will be about 6.5-7 lbs. A bit on the smaller side, particularly in Oakland where the average baby is over 8 pounds and they regularly deliver 10 pound babies (there are a lot of women in Oakland with gestational diabetes). But, she also said there's a very likely chance he'll be bigger due to the fact that he's sort of stretched out. Being on the taller side, he's not has cramped, so it's a little harder to get a really good estimate. Maybe we'll get a better idea after our ultrasound?

So, then what have I been doing while waiting for the bambino to arrive? I started maternity leave last Wednesday, so I've been basically lounging around at home, doing errands, and meeting up with friends and family. It's been really nice to have this time off to do all the little things, but man, I'd really like this baby to arrive...