Tuesday, January 4, 2011

What's the 411?

Well, AF was right on time and she arrived yesterday. Strangely enough, though, without any of the usual pre-notification spotting. Don't know what to make of it, but I won't dwell on it, let's just get this show on the road.

We have confirmed plans -- finally. Our schedule is like this:

1/7 - first ultrasound and bloodwork
1/8 - begin stims
1/11 - second ultrasound and bloodwork
1/12 - flight to Denver!

I can't believe we're already doing this. It seemed like January was so far away when we were doing the planning, but here we are 2011.

Based on our discussions with Dr. Sur, we will be pushing to Day 5 no matter what. I sincerely believe that CCRM's lab is good enough that if they don't survive to Day 5 in the lab, they wouldn't have survived in my ute. Also, this way we have a chance of doing some testing if the embryos make it and/or if they don't. Either way we'd get some answers.

I can't even begin to express how scared I am to move forward with this IVF cycle. I've been trying to stay calm, but the closer I get to actually starting the stims, the more anxious I am. I can't even say that I'm excited...more petrified than anything else. I wish I could say that I am hopeful or excited or even happy, but I can't. I'm just downright scared, more scared than I've been in a very long time.

I really feel that we've done all we can to prepare for this cycle. I've researched. I've taken supplements. I've cut back on exercise and increased my food intake. I've done it all and more, so please, please let this work.

7 comments:

Do I Have to Be a D.I.N.K.? said...

The mix of emotions is the hardest part...being so excited yet scared to death at the same time. I am hoping that the next couple weeks fly by for you!

Geochick said...

Now you have a schedule, that must be nice! Crazy couple of weeks lined up for you.

lowfatlady said...

Yea for af showing up! Good af. Woot for a schedule. You can do this! Just take one day at a time and do the best you can.

Rambler said...

I understand the range of emotions. It's all too much at times. Fear is a big part of this cycle for me, and I'm trying hard to tame it.

Glad that you are on schedule, it looks like you are doing two US at the local clinic?

sienna said...

i'm thinking the lack of spotting was bc of all the healthy changes you made in the last 6 months?? glad that AF came on time and that you have your calendar set. first two cycles were learning cycles, the third is the charm :o) just believe it. or if you're too afraid to hope, i'll do it aplenty for you. i know how scary this shit is. just lean on us if you need! xoxo.

ventingvagina said...

omg, that's next week!!!! i'm so excited for you.

don't be scared. you are following the rules. you are doing exactly what you should. please take care of yourself. breathe. relax. think positive thoughts. i'm with sienna - 3rd time's a charm and this is gonna be it for you. i just know it!!! xoxo!

AP said...

Hey there! Thank you so much for visiting my blog! i am sitting in my office still putting off going home to test. This has made me a procrastinator. Anyway, I'm adding you to my blogroll. Your end of year hate list made me laugh out loud. I personally can't stand sweaty gym equipment. YUCK!

good luck! AP